Female dictionary

Nothing, forget it = You better figure out what you did wrong

Are you tired? = Please don't go to sleep, I love talking to you

I'm OK = Hold me tight, I need a shoulder to cry on

I don't give a fuck anymore = I still care. But I'm tired of arguing with you

I'm cold = get a blanket and cuddle with me

Leave me alone = Please don't go

I love you = Tell me you do more

Lesson in Life

A wise man sat in the audience and cracked a joke. Everybody laughs like crazy. After a moment, he cracked the same joke again. This time, less people laughed. He cracked the same joke again and again. When there is no laughter in the crowd, he smiled and said: You can't laugh at the same joke again and again, but why do you keep crying over the same thing over and over again?

Quotes 1

1. I love everybody. Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and others I'd love to punch in the face.
2. How about you get to know me before you judge me. 
3. I don't regret my past, I just regret the time I wasted with the wrong people.
4. Some people can't sleep because they have insomnia. I can't sleep because I have internet connection.
5. The best way to make somebody remember you, borrow money from them.
6. Life doesn't get easier, you just get stronger.
7. Treat people as you would like to be treated. Karma's only a bitch if you are.
8. The greatest challenge in life it to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences and mistakes and yet still sees the best in you.
9. I'm so busy doing nothing that I can't do anything else.
10. While we try to teach our Children all about Life... Our Children teach us what Life is about.
11. In life, we do things, some we wish we had never done, some we wish we could replay a million times in our heads. But they all make us who we are, and in the end, they shape every detail about us. If we were to reverse any of them we wouldn't be the person we are. So just live. Make mistakes, have wonderful memories, but never ever second guess who you are, where you have been, and most importantly where it is you're going.
12. A man's biggest mistake is giving another man an opportunity to make his woman smile.
13. Falling in love is like jumping off a really tall building, your brain tells you it is not a good idea, but your heart tells you, you can fly.
14. Don't trust too much, don't hope too much, and don't love too much. Because that TOO MUCH can hurt you SO MUCH.
15. I may not get to see you as often as I like. I may not get to hold you in my arms all through the night. But deep in my heart I truly know, you're the one that I love, and I can't let you go.
16. Love is patient, Love is kind... It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. Love never fails.
17. A woman is like a tea bag. You never know how strong she is until you put her in hot water.
18. Good friends are like stars... You don't always see them, you know they are always there.
19. Smile... it will either warm their heart or piss them off... either way you win.
20. Don't like me? Cool, I don't wake up every day to impress you.
21. You were given this life because you were strong enough to live it.
22. There's a point in your life when you get tired of trying to fix everything and trying to make everyone happy. When you finally decide to quit, it's NOT giving up. It's realizing you don't need certain people and the bullshit they bring to your life.
23. Smile in the morning. People will wonder what you did last night.
24. Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer, and my alarm clock is the police.

Tomato Story

A Jobless man applied for the position of 'office boy' at Microsoft. The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a test.

'You are employed' he said. Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may start.

The man replied 'But I don't have a computer, neither an email'.

'I'm sorry', said the HR manager. If you don't have an email, that means you do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job.'

The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only $10 in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a 10Kg tomato crate.
He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In less than two hours,
he succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the operation three times,
and returned home with $60.

The man realized that he can survive by this way, and started to go everyday earlier, and return late. Thus, his money doubled or tripled everyday.

Shortly, he bought a cart, then a truck, and then he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.

5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food retailers in the US ...
He started to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance.

He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan.
When the conversation was concluded the broker asked him his email.
The man replied,'I don't have an email.'
The broker answered curiously, 'You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to build an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an e mail?!!' The man thought for a while and replied, 'Yes, I'd be an office boy at Microsoft!'

Moral of the story 
Moral 1
Internet is not the solution to your life.

Moral 2

If you don't have Internet, and work hard, you can be a millionaire.

Moral 3
If you received this message by email,
you are closer to being a office boy/girl, than a millionaire..........

Got this from my email recently

A Chat with Jesus Christ

Jesus: Hello. Did you call me?

Man: Called you? No. Who is this?

Jesus: This is Jesus. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.

Man: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am in the midst of something.

Jesus: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.

Man: Don’t know. But I can’t find free time. Life has become hectic. It’s rush hour all the time.

Jesus: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results. Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.

Man: I understand. But I still can’t figure out. By the way, I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.

Jesus: Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time, by giving you some clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you through the medium you are comfortable with.

Man: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?

Jesus: Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

Man: why are we then constantly unhappy?

Jesus: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become your habit. That’s why you are not happy.

Man: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?

Jesus: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

Man: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty.

Jesus: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

Man: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?

Jesus: Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don’t suffer. With that experience their life become better not bitter.

Man: You mean to say such experience is useful?

Jesus: Yes. In every term, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.

Man: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why can’t we be free from problems?

Jesus: Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons (to) Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

Man: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don’t know where we are heading.

Jesus: If you look outside you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

Man: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do?

Jesus: Success is a measure as decided by others. Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.

Man: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?

Jesus: Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Always count your blessing, not what you are missing.

Man: What surprises you about people?

Jesus: When they suffer they ask, “why me? When they prosper, they never ask “Why me” Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Man: Sometimes I ask, who I am, why am I here. I can’t get the answer.

Jesus: Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

Man: How can I get the best out of life?

Jesus: Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

Man: One last question. Sometimes I feel my prayers are not answered.

Jesus: There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

Man: Thank you for this wonderful chat. I am so happy to start the day with a new sense of inspiration.

Jesus: Well. Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don’t believe your doubts and doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve not a problem to resolve. Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

Man: Thank you so much.

Jesus: You are always welcome. Have a good day my friend.
‎"Always remember, God's Word is the Word for YOU".
by: Aries Quismundo

Rules to Remember in Life

1. Money cannot buy happiness but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy but remember the bastards name.
3. Help someone when they are in trouble and they will remember you...when they're in trouble again.
4. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.
5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then again neither does milk~!

Guardian Grandma

By, Cheah Kok Hin


July 17, 2001, was the first time I had to visit my grandmother at the intensive care unit of the hospital. Po-po had been suffering from diabetes for a few years. That day, she had to go for a heart operation.

I remember that morning. I was 12 then, and felt so bored at the hospital that I went around playing with my cousins and brother. We didn't notice the gloomy faces of our parents, who soon asked my uncle to take us back to his condominium. There, we had a great time at the pool.

I didn't know why, or how, but for the first time, I felt that the water was clearer than usual. I reckoned the workers had cleaned it. I played and played, and didn't realise the time.

It was the best swim I'd ever had. I wasn't afraid of the water, and I didn't think about drowning. It was as if a guardian angel was among us ...

After a few hours, uncle took us back to the hospital. All that swimming had left me tired. Suddenly, I remembered my grandmother.

"How is Po-po?"

"I don't think she will make it," uncle said.

I was dumbstruck. Just as we reached the ward, the lift door opened and there were all my aunts and uncles, crying. My cousins were sitting in a corner, heads down.

I started to cry. Mom came and hugged me. I shrugged her off and went to a corner. I couldn't believe what was happening.

Back in my uncle's car, suddenly, I knew why I had had such a great time in the pool. It was Po-po's was of giving me a happy time, even when she was having a bad time ...

Sent to Starmag